The Father I Never Knew

The year is mid 1980. Sometimes in June. Mary made sure that the cold winter breeze didn't come anywhere near her daughter. Wrapped up in a shawl and a heavy blanket on top, Mary held on to her baby tight, as she stood by the railway office awaiting her call to board the train. Mary was accompanied by her own mother, and she was all smiles because she was going to meet the father of her baby in Palapye. She just imagined the look on his face when he sees his own blood for the first time. She couldn't stop talking about him, and telling her mother how she(her mother) is going to get along just fine with her child's father as he was the most sweetest guy on earth.

It took them about 6 hours to reach Palapye. In those days the train was the most oftenly used mode of transport as it was safe and very cheap. And when they reached the railway station in Palapye, so many people got off the train, while a lot more got in. There was so much traffic that Mary almost lost sight of her mother when she went to get their luggage.
When they were all done, they stood there waiting for him. Mary couldn't stop looking this way and that. Anxious to see him walking towards them. God! Why is he taking forever? Mary wondered. Mary's mum could see that her daughter was loosing patience and she kept on re-assuring her. It was times like those that one would realise what a good source of strength a mother can be. Suddenly...there he was! Coming at full speed towards Mary, her mother and the baby.

Mary started beeming with joy at the sight of him. He came towards them, shoving his way through a lot of travellers who were fighting their ways from and into the train. Mary gave her mother the baby so that she could prepare herself to welcome her soon-to-be husband. All of a sudden, she lost sight of him. God! Where did he go now? Where is he? Mary looked at her mum. For what? Answers maybe. But he was gone.

15 years later i came to know the man who, i was told was the same guy who abundend my mum and her mother at the train station! I was told he was my real father. I didn't believe that. Do you guys blame me? I don't think so. I would have believed it if this guy had tried all he could to make up for all the time he lost and all the heartache he brought to my mum. He should have tried to show me a fatherly love i never had. But instead he behaved like some high-school guy, who gets so over excited after a girl agrees to his wooing. This guy was so excited at the thought of having a 15 year old kid. Fuck! For what? Where the fcuk had he been when my mum struggled to see me through to all the 15 years i was then? Why the fcuk did he run away? As if that wasn't enuff, he went ahead and physically and emotionally abuse my mum! God!

Now you guys understand why i never realy took to this guy hey? And the reason why i didn't change my second name to his when he married my mum? Well...the truth is...i really hated this guy! Ooooh! yes i did. And i don't feel sorry about that. And all the time i've been staying with him, i never really felt that he was my father. I felt nothing for him. Absolutely nothing! I didn't even cry at his funeral. When my aunt phoned me to tell me about his death i was like 'really? Oh, okay''. Yah thats what i said. If you thinking that in my heart i said 'thank God!''...well..yah i said that. Coz i knew my mum was goinno be free from all the abuse and all.

So, to all the fathers out there, please make sure your kids get to know you. Even if you are not able to take care of them, or be with them as much as you have to, let them know you care about them. Shit happens and the saying that goes 'any man can have a baby, but it takes a real man to be a father'..is true most of the times.

One more thing..celebrate African Child's Day on June 16 with caution. And wish me luck on June 18 as i take another step up into adulthood.

Happy Father's Day...!

Jaybabe On A Safari Cruise

It's unlike me right? Yah i know. It was my first time to leave Blogville for a few days without letting you guys know. And i'm sorry. Well..i needed ample time to prepare for the cruise i went on with P.S last week. Really i cant say much, but will try and upload some nice pictures for you guys. Hope they'll tell you about it all. And i must also admit i enjoyed every minute of it, though a part of me also missed Blogville. Well..you guys are doing great, all of you, i gues.

The first days P.S came in we stayed at Camp Itumela in a little town 45kms from my home town. I gues those three in a row enjoyed themselves too, and God knows how much i would give anything to see them happy like that everyday. As its the case, these three are trouble multiplied 3 three time maybe. We found the ham missing in our groceries, and the three didnt know where it went to until Vicky made up a story about finding a cat inside the house licking its mouth. I wish this girl to grow fast to blog about where the ham went to and the story about the cat. God!!!!

Chalets at Camp Itumela. Very cool stuff.

3 in a row spent their first night in here at Camp Itumela, but the next day we decided to swap places coz they didnt give us any time to sleep. They wanted to use the toilet every second they had to sleep all through the night. It was cool, but again the tent is so very cold! Maybe thats why the anklenappers couldn't sleep! Maybe.

After dropping the kids off at home, the cruise started with this guy somewhere deep down Chobe game reserve. I wanted to take a picture of me with him, but immediately P.S opened the door, this bloody guys ran off. I learnt from P.S that when animals see a person inside a car, it doesn't matter, but immediately they see your legs they run off! Stupid fools!

I forgot the name of the river, and i'm so ashamed to say that P.S knows all the four corners of this country like the back of his hand. Just imagine! Not knowing anything there is to know! Geeee! He told me the name of this river..dammmnnnit! what was it he said? Anyway...we found that truch stuck in there. I dont wanna explain how i felt when we crossed the river ourselves! Like i could see the waters by my window! God! P.S said the year before, when he came that way, the river was overflowing, and he did managed to cross, but one crocodile hit the front of the car! I would've died there and there i swear! I didn't believe it when we crossed over, leaving the poor truck and its drivers still tryina dig it out.

In our culture we believe that its not right to come face to face or into contact with your totem. My totem is an elephant. But here i am, looking at it. By the way it was my first time to see this animal. P.S told me that in this area there are so many of them. Well, i've heard, but he told me to wait and see!

Here, we were at Savuti camp. Good people, here you better be careful oo! Camp at your own risk! Thats why we decided to make our own double storey shack. PS told me how the lions are gonna be coming in at around evening time, and do you people want to know at what time i went to sleep? It was fun but really i didnt get enuff sleep that night. Everytime I closed my eyes I'll hear the lion roaring some few meters away! Can you guys believe that PS will even laugh at me when i get scared? The next morning i just couldn't wait to get outta that place.

Foolish bucks! Get outta the way dammnit!

Some beautiful chalet we used that over looked the Chobe River. Very beautiful. This was at Toro Safari Lodge.

I wasn't really laying there for a tan, i don't need it do i?

Jaybabe chilling at Chobe Safari Lodge. Very nice place. I think somebody was paparazzing around. I would kill that person!!!..lol..

Chobe Safari Lodge bar. The way beer will pass down your throat at this bar, sounds so much like the water flowing swiftly down the river near by...

Ladies rest rooms. God!!...i could eat inside this place!

10 minutes before the boat cruise...

Chilling on the boat deck. It was better to get a lil nearer...

Our boat was not the only one in the river...

More boats...

Don't mind those elephants, look at P.S's pony-tailed hair on the left there. This hunk's hair had grown so big since the last time i saw it. All shiny with spirals like it was tonged. Damnnn..tried so hard to ask him how he manages to keep it healthy like that. Just ask him to take off the band and watch it over his shoulders! God!!
One other thing you should know about this guy is that he loves elephants so much like his whole life depended on them. Not excusing the other animals, but i think elephants are his favourite.Log on to his Website for more...

...lol..PS thinks i was flirting with those guys on the boat! Ha! Me?..i aint a flirt. I can't do that in front of my man anyway...thats being disrespectful...

The boat cruise took us 3 hours 30 minutes. So thats Chobe Safari Lodge viewed from the river. After the sun went down. Beautiful don't you think?...

I gues you can see Jaybabe getting off the boat right?...

If i had enuff money as i wished i'll use this mode of transport everyday. I couldn't believe it only took me one and a half hours to get back to Gabz from Kasane. Instead of the usual 6/7 hours by bus. As always, it was not easy to see him go. But i know we'll meet again.
Guys, i really think i needed this outting you know? All those weekends i never had due to my commitment to this job, God! Ijust needed some time out. And i must say that i feel that as my birthday is coming on the 18th, i think i've already celebrated it.
I have about more than 400 pictures taken on this holiday, and really i just thought i should share with all of you just those, coz i'm so lazy to upload all of them at photobucket. But thats just about all that happened while i was away. Geeee....this must have been one of my longest posts ever right? I'm tired too. See all of you guys at your pages. I will try and develop www.jaybabe.com I'm tryina figure out what to put in there.
Any personal questions should be sent to seane@jaybabe.com

I love you all...and i missed all of you...

Words Of Wisdom

hello errryburry, i got this from a friend and thought you could also learn from it.

stop telling people how they should live their lives by asking them personal questions like when are you buying a car , buying a house, when are you getting married, when are you having a child etc.

stop asking people questions they don't have answers for, it exposes your level of maturity and intelligence e.g. why do you have skin rashes, have gained or lost weight etc.

if something is not your business stay out of it unless you are asked for advise.

it is normal to gossip but please don't make it a habit, rather turn your gossiping skills into something positive.

nobody is perfect; we all have our weaknesses, so stop complaining or criticising other people, because they also feel the same about you. it is just that they are emotionally matured and accept you the way you are.

compliment a person if she looks nice instead of asking what is the occasion

try to associate with positive people and avoid negative people who always try to bring you down

if a person tells you something confidential or personal stop discussing it with other people, it exposes your level of maturity

learn to think before you talk

with luv
jaybabe.