Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Fair Enough- Oprah Said It Better


If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.


I always tell people that, nna, from what i've learnt so far, and from what i've seen and experienced so far, no man will ever bring me down. I'm not gonna allow a man to rule my life. At some point i had thought it was supposed to be like that. Take verything from your man. Do as he says. Do what he wants. Put your feelings aside. Make him happy. Satisfy him in any way possible. It was always about him, him and him. But then, there came a time when i was like, ''what could be wrong in being me for once? Just for once?''

I'm a regular reader of O'Mag. And this is what Oprah has to say about men:

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes
you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you
deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

Don't stay because you think "it will get better."
You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything.* He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man's behaviour.* Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less. Never let a man define who you are.

Never borrow someone else's man.
If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.
You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary. Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr.. Right. Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.
Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.

I just thought it wise to share this with all of you guys. They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of us women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful. You should know that you're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one. They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one. Ladies take care of your own hearts....

NB: Popstar Update:
I've decided to switch off my phones for the next whole week bcoz those mo..fu's have decided to show the auditions proceedings on national t.v Now i'm in trouble. Since yesterday my phones never stop ringing. Smses going thru. People telling me good luck. I tried to explain that i didnt make it to the top 20, but seems like those my words are falling into deaf ears! Dammmnit! I can't even get into a taxi without people murmuring, ''thats one of them!'' Ooohh shit!! This is more than a nightmare...!

16 comments:

ShadeCrown said...

PREAAAAAAAAACH IT!!

eddiie said...

......interesting facts....

Ms. emmotions said...

ride on sista !!

may ur ink not dry out ma sista !!!

Eyin'ju Oluwa said...

Truth!!!

wat did u audition for babe? how have u been love?

diary of a G said...

hey jaylove

just finished reading ur previous post...thanks for the laffs...i'll
use em jokes to just some *wink* lol

this ur new post for the ladies sounds like common sense for the most part..if not all of it

i see u'll gotten a taste of fame
how does it feel? nevertheless?

candybox said...

I know a few people who need to read this, is it ok to forward? It may sound like common sense to you and me but sadly it ain't so to some people.

Jennifer A. said...

Yessssssss...

It bothers me much when women try to re-create themselves for me, instead of being true to themselves...

I've heard of stories where women change stuff abt themselves to suit their mens' tastes, and.......the men still exit the building at the end of the day yo!

ozaveshe said...

hey jaybabe, i'm back missed quite a lot of what's been going on in your ever exciting life. so now you're a popstar, whats the next entetainment direction - Oprah of Gaborone?

and ur post really was sensible. thing is, if too many girls read it then some casanova i know will be out of business

ozaveshe said...

hey jaybabe, i'm back missed quite a lot of what's been going on in your ever exciting life. so now you're a popstar, whats the next entetainment direction - Oprah of Gaborone?

and ur post really was sensible. thing is, if too many girls read it then some casanova i know will be out of business

Unknown said...

lol!! Go Oprah!! Though I think Pammy would have said it better.

(Just Playing)...

Well, enjoy the instant stardom ehn.....

LOL!! If I had that number - I would have been one of those callers ...heheheheheheh

anonymous gal(retired blogger) said...

lol @ the fone calls. yeah Oprah is a feminist so no one could have said it better.

Afrobabe said...

enjoy the fame sis...you can even use it to ur own advantage...

Anonymous said...

u right!preach it sister

1l said...

Five nice pink bums in a row but none as nice as the real thing.
Just to let y'all know and the double e's will be releaved....Perfect Stranger has left the building

InCogNaija said...

AH! the life of a celebrity...can i get an autograph? lol! it is one of those things.

Eb the Celeb said...

Good stuff here!