The Father I Never Knew

The year is mid 1980. Sometimes in June. Mary made sure that the cold winter breeze didn't come anywhere near her daughter. Wrapped up in a shawl and a heavy blanket on top, Mary held on to her baby tight, as she stood by the railway office awaiting her call to board the train. Mary was accompanied by her own mother, and she was all smiles because she was going to meet the father of her baby in Palapye. She just imagined the look on his face when he sees his own blood for the first time. She couldn't stop talking about him, and telling her mother how she(her mother) is going to get along just fine with her child's father as he was the most sweetest guy on earth.

It took them about 6 hours to reach Palapye. In those days the train was the most oftenly used mode of transport as it was safe and very cheap. And when they reached the railway station in Palapye, so many people got off the train, while a lot more got in. There was so much traffic that Mary almost lost sight of her mother when she went to get their luggage.
When they were all done, they stood there waiting for him. Mary couldn't stop looking this way and that. Anxious to see him walking towards them. God! Why is he taking forever? Mary wondered. Mary's mum could see that her daughter was loosing patience and she kept on re-assuring her. It was times like those that one would realise what a good source of strength a mother can be. Suddenly...there he was! Coming at full speed towards Mary, her mother and the baby.

Mary started beeming with joy at the sight of him. He came towards them, shoving his way through a lot of travellers who were fighting their ways from and into the train. Mary gave her mother the baby so that she could prepare herself to welcome her soon-to-be husband. All of a sudden, she lost sight of him. God! Where did he go now? Where is he? Mary looked at her mum. For what? Answers maybe. But he was gone.

15 years later i came to know the man who, i was told was the same guy who abundend my mum and her mother at the train station! I was told he was my real father. I didn't believe that. Do you guys blame me? I don't think so. I would have believed it if this guy had tried all he could to make up for all the time he lost and all the heartache he brought to my mum. He should have tried to show me a fatherly love i never had. But instead he behaved like some high-school guy, who gets so over excited after a girl agrees to his wooing. This guy was so excited at the thought of having a 15 year old kid. Fuck! For what? Where the fcuk had he been when my mum struggled to see me through to all the 15 years i was then? Why the fcuk did he run away? As if that wasn't enuff, he went ahead and physically and emotionally abuse my mum! God!

Now you guys understand why i never realy took to this guy hey? And the reason why i didn't change my second name to his when he married my mum? Well...the truth is...i really hated this guy! Ooooh! yes i did. And i don't feel sorry about that. And all the time i've been staying with him, i never really felt that he was my father. I felt nothing for him. Absolutely nothing! I didn't even cry at his funeral. When my aunt phoned me to tell me about his death i was like 'really? Oh, okay''. Yah thats what i said. If you thinking that in my heart i said 'thank God!''...well..yah i said that. Coz i knew my mum was goinno be free from all the abuse and all.

So, to all the fathers out there, please make sure your kids get to know you. Even if you are not able to take care of them, or be with them as much as you have to, let them know you care about them. Shit happens and the saying that goes 'any man can have a baby, but it takes a real man to be a father'..is true most of the times.

One more thing..celebrate African Child's Day on June 16 with caution. And wish me luck on June 18 as i take another step up into adulthood.

Happy Father's Day...!