Happy Days Are Here...Still

For the nth time, meet these two boys and a girl, who came in row. I've said it many a times without number, i'm not ashamed to have had them at 22! I still believe everything happens for a reason, and one day i know i'll get to know that reason. The folowing story is a dedication to them:



Once upon a time, in the remotest area ever, deep into the forest, at one cattle post, there was a girl. A little girl. She was 8 years old. Her name was Seanel (pronounced Shaw-nel).
To her life seemed just fine. Herding the goats into the kraal in the evening, separating the young from their mothers, and retiring to sit around the fire, was all she knew all those days of her life. She was in grade/standard 3. Staying at the cattle post, tracking a couple of kilometers to school everyday, barefooted, didn’t matter that much to her. All she wanted was to get an education. Dammmnnn! At a mere 8 years? What did she understand about the importance of education?

She was staying with her mother’s grandmother. And 10 more distant cousins. They lived in a small mud hut that had only a drum as the door. The roundavell was not big enough to accommodate all of them, but they had no choice.

Her mother stayed in the big city, trying to find work. She only gotten to see her mother 2 times during those 2 years she stayed at the cattle post. At that time, the only means of communication was through writing letters, and during her stay at the cattle post, she received only one letter from her mother. In that letter her mother wrote, telling her how much she loves her, and that very soon she’ll come take her to the city. In the letter, her mother asked her to hold on a little while longer. Inside the envelope was also enclosed some 60thebe coins. It was a lot of money at that time, coz she managed to buy herself half loaf of bread and some sweets.
During those years, she only got new clothes 2 times in 2 years, i.e. only on Christmas. The pair of panties she got during the course of the year, she never wore. The older cousins took them away from her. So she went to school with no underwear. The new pair of foot flops she got, she never wore them too. That’s why she walked barefooted to school everyday. Life at the cattle post was very hard. And living with those distant cousins made it harder. But that’s not what she cared about. She wanted the years to come and pass. She wanted the days to go by. She prayed for her mother to find work. She wished for the day, her mother will come, hold her hand, and tell her that, ‘’I’ve come for you. Pack your bags and let’s go’’.
After school she had to rush home (to the cattle post), because if she came late, she won’t find anything to eat. All the 11 of them ate in one big basin. When it was time to eat, it was survival of the fittest or an early bird catching the fattest worm kind of thing. Summer was fine, except for the constant biting of the mosquitoes. Winter was worse. She’ll be having on just a simple skirt and a very light top. That’s all she had then.

It was not safe living at the cattle post. It was difficult for her, herding the goats with no shoes on. But she had to coz she was ordered to. Else she would go for days without food. The water they used to wash with, bath with, cook and drink came from a well. And everyday, each one of them should fetch at least 5 buckets of that water. There was a time when she nearly fell into the well and when she got home, and told the grandmother, she was given the beating of her life!


One day she was coming from school after the afternoon study. She was walking alone. On the way, up on the road she saw a white car parked in the middle of the road. And 3 men were standing on the road too, discussing something she couldn’t hear. Immediately she saw the car, she branched into the bush and hid under one shrub. She waited. Listening to the men talk. She kept her breath very low. After what seemed like ages, the men left. She thanked her God, and proceeded to going home. In those days child abduction was very common, and in seeing those men that’s the first thing that came to her mind. Remember we talking about an 8 year old.

The best thing about this little girl was that she was very smart in class. At other times, when the teacher was not in, she’ll take over. And her teacher loved her that much. There was a time when she was called to a grade 5 class. When she got there, she was asked to explain to the learners the difference between a bird, bad and bed. And how to pronounce those words. The day her mother came to ask for her transfer, her teacher cried uncontrollably. But to her that was dreams come true….

Back to reality:
My middle name is Seane. I just added that (l) for the story.People don’t believe that, that happened to me as a child. I don’t know why. But it did. And today when I tell my mum about it she goes like, ‘’look where that got you now. You are a very smart responsible lady. I used to hurt that I did that to you, but there are times that I feel proud that I left you at the cattle post, coz of what you are today. I’m proud of you’’.


Today I do believe that what goes around comes around. I wasn’t staying with my mum when I started school and all, and now my kids are not staying with me. Sometimes I feel the reason why my mum doesn’t want me to take the kids is because she wants to make it up to me, for not staying with me when I was growing up. At the time I needed her the most. But, what if when those 3 grow up, they are gonna ask me why I didn’t stay with them now? Well P.S says that if I stayed with those 3, I’ll spoil them rotten. I believe him, coz I saw that, the time I was staying with them back in 2004. He says that my mum can do the better job in raising them up.


And I think I understand now why my mum could not stay with me then. That’s why I want to talk about it here. For the very last time in my life. She didn’t have a choice. Life was hard for her. And I think she didn’t want to put me through all that at that time. Thank God I was- and still am- her only child. It was better. Imagine me fending for 3. But I’m not complaining ooo! I have my mum to thank. She’s doing gr8 with the kids and I’ll always be gr8ful for that. I’m still wondering what I can get her for this coming xmas.


I just wanted to let this out of my chest. I feel much better now. And for the record...i don't want my kids to go through what i went through. I'll make sure of that...

Half A Dozen Ain't Really Six

Tia: So what are you gonna do Jay?
Me: About what?
Tia: About this situation?
Me: Is there anything i can do?
Tia: Thought so.
Me: Like what?
Tia: Tell him how you feel.
Me: He knows.
Tia: Tell him some more
Me: Will that change anything?
Tia: Maybe
Me: No...i know that guy. When his mind is made up, there's no going back.
Tia: So crying is your best option?
Me: Am through with that. He told me to cry. Maybe he knew I was going to. Now I’ve cried my heart out. It feels good. It feels much better.

Silence.

Tia: But you love him Jaybabe!
Me: Yah I know. Everybody knows. My mum knows. The kids know. And most of all…he knows.
Tia: I don’t like you like this you know Jay?
Me: It’ll come to pass, don’t worry.
Tia: But you hurting!
Me: It’ll be fine….I’ll be fine.
Tia: What’s the real issue kante?
Me: Problem is, he says I’m too possessive, just because I asked why he didn’t send anything. That’s kind of like caging him. Like he’s prone to send. But I was just asking for the sake of it, you know?
Tia: (still reading the email I printed to show her) so that’s the only reason why he’s choosing to do this?
Me: Yeah…
Tia: Oooooooh! P.S you are hurting my friend oooo! Mxem!....what did you say to this?
Me: I obliged. Maybe it’s for the best. I know I’m possessive. I was born like that. I can’t change it.
Tia:….eish..Jaybabe..i..i just donno what to say you know?..
Me: Don’t say anything girl..I’ll be fine.

My Blogg...My Country

Errmmm...**clears throat**... P.S asked me to try on a wig! Now look at the results! Not bad is it? Well i edited the picture to black and white for a change. Still looks better. Even though we nearly fought when he asked me to cut off my hair! Oh my...he doesn't know the time, money and energy i spent to get my hair to where is it right now! Men don't understand some things to they?

My blogg turned 1 last month. Due to this change of privatisation shit i even forgot to wish my page a happy birthday! Dammmnit! Well our country was turning 41 too on sunday (September 30th). So it was a holiday on monday (thats why i didn't publish a post then) and our sweet president also gave us tuesday to rest! Can you believe that! Wow! I thank God for this president oo! Now you understand why i had to post today right?

I wanna tell you guys something. I should've written this sometime ago, but i had thought things were gonna get better. Du guys remember Ugo Daniels' post about some guys in his school who wanted to...errmmm..kinda shag him? The gay guys? And i left a comment on that post saying that i think Ugo was gay and didn't wanna say it? Well he didn't like that. And i apologised. Now i know exactly what he was going through and what he went thru at that time. Yess coz it happened to me! And again to Ugo Dee...i'm sorry.

You know how its like at the start of the semester? First years running up and down corridors, tryina locate their classes? And it really gotten into my nerves when they'll just bump into you and ask, ''where can i find block 240?''... bloody pikin! do i know?..nonsense! Another one went like, ''can you please show me the science block?''...eeehhwooo! am i doing science?..**hisss**..
Due to all these questions i ended up forgeting which block i had to go to for my business statistics lecture. Mistakenly i went to block 239. When i got in there i just saw new faces.
''Ermm, excuse me? which course is getting in?'' I asked one guy sitted just by the entrance. ''Basic accounting?'' Whaaaat! Dammmnn. So i get outta the class. Waited there for a while, tryina figure out which class to go to for my lecture which was goinno be in 10 minutes.

While still tryina crack my head, one girl came over. Got into the class, and about 5 seconds she got out. Came to me and said, ''which course are you waiting for?''...she appeared as a foreigner to me and the way she spoke her english sounded familiar.
''Business stats''
''Ohh? I'm also taking that one too. But i thought this was the class we were to be in''
''Me too''
''Dammn! what do we do?...okay let's go check at 203''
''Yeah i also thought of that, coz i wasn't sure if it was 239 or 203''

When we left for 203, and we were walking along the corridor, she wants to hold my hand! What! I quickly moved my hand to the other side. What kinda girl is this one? Wants to hold my hand? So that we walk hand in hand? Nonsense!

When we got to class i saw that those were my class mates. So we came to the right class. We looked for a place to sit and she set next to me. I like sitting at the front row. She whispers into my ear, ''lets go sit at the back''
''No i like sitting in front''
''Oh? Okay''.
''Were you in this class before? Coz i don't remember your face you know?''
''No. I'm re-taking this course. I'll be through this december''.
''Okay....so where you from?''
''Why?''
''Your tone you know? Sounds like you come from up north''
''I'm from Kenya''
''You are from Kenya!!!?''
''Yeah, what? You know anybody from Kenya?''
''Yah, i used to know somebody from Kenya''.
''So what's your name? Coz i'm Jane''.
''Oh. I'm Daisy*.

And then it continued like that. We met everyday in class. I mean that i only saw her in class. Having figured out what she was and still is, i avoided chances of sitting next to her from then on. But everytime she came into class and saw that there wasn't any sit next to me where she cud sit, she'd try by all means to shift with anyone who'll be sitting next to me.

The other time i was craving for something hot, and then i went to Riverwalk mall for a piece of Nandos. I was there at the counter placing my order when suddenly i heared a familiar voice shouting my name across the room! Godammnit! i don't like my name shouted across the room! When i turned my head, she was there with two other guys. Quickly she jumped to her feet and came to meet me. ''Hi''. She hugged me VEEERY tight ooo! Like she wanted to squeeze whatever was inside me.

''So you do eat out?''...was i shaking?
''No..ermm..those guys are my friends, so they just took me out for a snack''
''Oh? good for you''. My order came. ''Lemme go, i don't want you to keep your friends waiting''
''Hey, wait! Can i get your number? You know like we go to the same class, but i don't have your number?''
''Oh yeah, you can have that one''. So i gave her my number and left.

The next day in class she came. It was her lucky day maybe, coz a sit next to me was un-occupied, so she came rushing in, and before sitting down she said hi to me and hovered over me to gimme a hug. Well i thought it was goinno be a hug. But she did what? Placed a very wet pack on my cheek! Guys.. a very wet pack! Yack! See me now even up to this day i still scrub my cheek with that rug!
When i turned around people were watching and i've never felt this embrassed in my life! And the way people were looking, it was like they new how this girl was, and maybe were wondering if i didn't know or if i was in too!

''You are a liar, how come you never called me after you took my number the other day?''
I just wanted to be friendly ooo! Coz i knew if i had to face this girl, she wouldn't wanna come to class anymore (which i'm still gonna do).
''Ooooh yeah, you know i had to lend my sister the phone and..blah blah blah... But i'll call you tonight. I promise''. Mxem! Do i look like i care even if you don't call? Nonsense!

This girl cannot stop complimenting me oo! Today it's, ''dammmnn Jane you looking so hot!''. And tomorow it's, ''where do you buy your clothes? coz that bag really matches your outfit''.
Kai! Lord have mercy!

You guys don't wanna know the sms she sent me do you?