Future Kids

WITH THE WAY THE WORLD IS, IT MAY NOT BE SUPRISING IF THIS IS WHAT THE NEXT GENERATION WOULD BE LIKE.

Wishing you a blessed weekend guys. Me? Oh! I'm going home saturday. Will be with my kids then. The two posts on both the blogs reminded me of them.

Salute! XX

Cook Him A Nice Meal...

Q: My husband wants a threesome with me and my best friend.
A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing there's only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing and thats your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can only bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you are still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him
A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totaly selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day: then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys
A: This is perfectly natural behaviour and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two(it's a great time to clean the house too!). Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him, then you cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris are.
A: Your clitoris are of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay
A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay for men is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is you do not love your husband as much as you should; he should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you should make it up to him by performing oral..and cooking him a...

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one
A: I'm not sure i understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a great meal.

If men were to write advice columns...it would be a disaster...

We Wearing The Same Shoes

Overwhelmed Naija babe's post ignited something in me to write up this one. Had never wanted to write this, but just wanted to let her see and know that at one point she and i were putting on the same shoes.

Like you can see in this picture..i'm really doing fine.

I didn't know it happened to every guy, or does it? Maybe some guys can control it. And read the writting on the wall when you tell them it's over. But for some i gues it'll take them ages. And then another thing is, the name calling, the swearing, the threats and all? Why don't women do that? I can be hurt when a guy tells me it's over. I'll be heartbroken to see him with another woman walking past by. I would wish i had done things right. I would wish to turn back the hands of time and right what i wronged. But i've seen that people(guys/men) don't do that. They'll rather make your life a living hell. They'll make sure you don't get to wish for the next day. They'll never leave you alone. In my case he even went to an extent of communicating with my current, just like Diary of a G would run to the males who left comments on OWNB's page.

How was a man and a woman made? Different? How? Why don't i follow his current and make threats to her? I used to think that men are stronger than women. Now i see that physically yes, but emotionally no!

The following conversation is the last one i had with my ex at google chat, this was in January this year:

Him: Thanks(after he asked me to log on to the chat room)
can I talk before you do?

me: so wareng?

Him: I want to set something straight
I want to tell you that whatever stuff i said to you, like call you a whore, a bitch, sicko
I actually never meant it
and I did say that in my sms last night
I want to undo whatever curse i laid on you today
I want you to know that its only Love that I only intended
I guess I loved you too much
there is a proverb that says
that when you love too much you break the amblical cord
you seen a new born lamb
that thing hanging, the mother loves the lamb too much

that she steps on the cord unintentionally
I want you to have the best Life you could posibbly dream about
I want you to be Loved more than I ever said or claimed that I love you
I want you to smile
my sincere apologies to whatever pain, humiliation i might have caused you
I want you to let me go
I want you to stop Loving me like you said
I want you to find other better jokes than my sour jokes that I told you
I want you to get somebody who can dance
I want you to get a friend first before a lover
I want your new man not to hold your hand in a public restaurant
coz you want to chew on bones.. damn I loved that
I want ...fuck... I dont want to cry.. but Its something that I have to do.

I want you to walk away
I want you to just leave and pls forget me
because I will forget you when you logg of this email
Thats all I wanted to say.. I am really sorry

me: I've heard all that

Him: its gonna be hard oh God, but its for the best
I want you to have the best

me: its goinno be very hard letting you go too, but i have to, i cannot go on like that with you

Him:You gonna have to let me go.. if you hold something even tiny in your heart for me
I will still perceive it a thousand miles from here
I always feel you inside me always.. but an hour ago, my heart was in mouring.. you died, not heart broken i mean you died
Dont wish me anything
I dont want pity
I hate pity.. i never was good in pity
Dont remember me
If you do remember me, my Love for you was genuine,

my heart will ache. So just put the switch off and close the door

me: okay

Him: Your heart speaketh but to mine without a touch, a phone or eyes

me: that i know

Him: So, I beg of you to just close this chapter.. Sigh
I actually made that sigh
dont ever write about me or send me emails or call me or sms me
Just walk away

me: ok.ok.ok.ok i've heard i'll do that

Him: By the way, Roselyne(thats the sister) asked about you.. My mother too asked about you. I guess I will have to tell them that we are no longer together. And that it was for the best and no further discussion

me: yeah please do that
its for the best you know?
that everybody goes their way
this hurting and the fighting was really getting into me

Him: Log off, coz now i will delete you from my mailing list and all the emails you ever wrote.. pls do that also from your side

my last words to you
I Love you and if you doing this for your own Good sake,

then who am I to stop you from your decisions
least you have made them, wrong's n right's.
I made my wrongs most of the time
I think, I might just drink or stop
afterall I dont deserve to be hurt anymore
what can I say more
well, I Love you...
You dont have to feel anything
because i know gore i'm saying it from the bottom of my heart
you have walked away from me when I needed you most
..yeah... good comes from bad
thats what my Grandmother always told me
Good comes from Bad
its okay you made your decision.. um young.. ambitious and above all..

i dont lust
I take my time
wish all the best in your life... I will always Love your kids
in my heart, they are my kids
Go well dont post this on your blog.. its my last request from you

Despite this conversation i'm still getting threatning mails,messages and nasty comments on my blog. But it's okay. Like i told OWNB i do ignore everything.

Just last night i got two smses from the guy:

1.IF I SAID GORE I DONT THINK ABOUT YOU EVERY DAY I WUD BE LYIN. HELO JANE.

And then i ignored like always. Then after a while

2.ANYWAY I WILL KILL YOUR BOYFRIEND OR HE WILL KILL ME. WHO EVER KILLS THE OTHER ONE FIRST.

So guys, i gues you wondering what i did ehh? Like i always do-IGNORE! Somebody adviced OWNB to save the threat messages for every reason. I'll do like wise.

Nice weekend....xx

Yes!!! Hollywood came to Botswana

Even though i didn't come to work this past weekend-to make money of course- i had a wonderful little weekend of my own.
The film crew from United States were shooting the Nite club parts of the movie- No.1 Ladies Detective Agency. A movie which is goinno be turned into a series in no time.


I'm pictured here with my cousins- Faith(in red track suit) and Osetse.

I saw the film crew friday nite and i had thought i was gonna come in the morning of saturday to take some pictures, not knowing that friday night was their last night at Eros bar. They came and renovated the bar into the one that's in the book- No.1 Ladies Detective Agency by Alex McCall Smith.The bar now is The Go-go Handsome Mens Bar...lol..i have never read the book.
Heard about it for the very first time from my babe when he was here in May. We even went to look for the book at one book store in Game City Mall, but didn't find it.

I argued with him on how come he was leaving in the U.K and knew about the book that was set in my country and i didn't know about that. I hear it's a very nice book which has already sold at least 15 million copies right now in Britain. I gues it's still gonna sell more after it's turned into this movie-especially that the lead actress is Jill Scott..oh my God! You people should've seen how she looked in that african print skirt! Oh my...she has a behind that's exactly the same as that of somebody from my home village-Serowe. She looked so damn Botswanian!




Like i said this bar used to be called Eros. And i heard the film crew paid the owner a lot of money just for him to allow them to shoot their movie here. I pass by this place every morning when i come to the office. And i sometimes come here with my cousins coz this bar strictly plays jazz. No kwaito, no r & b, no mpaqanga, no house muzic, no traditional muzic, no rave, no acid, no reggae-nothing! Strictly jazz fusion. The kind of muzic my babe would love. Like all you'll hear is the sound of piano, saxophone, violins,trumpets and a little bit of drums here and there.A lot of commoners here are very old people, mostly married old couples.
I'm still trying to locate where the film crew could be shooting rite now-coz i want to take some pics of them rolling the cameras and shouting their cut! stints. I've seen on newspapers places where they'll be shooting this movie, but i will get them, i know.

I was bored saturday morning so i went to Game City mall to spoil myself a little bit.Took my camera with me. Then from Game City i passed by Riverwalk mall. Aaaaagg!, i don't like this mall coz majority of people who do their rounds here are white people(please i'm not saying i hate white people-my babe is white now!), and besides the shops here are so godamn expensive. But it was quiet fun. Saw that the Debswana company sponsored some people to come teach/train some little kids in karate. On my way back home i stopped by Handsome Mens bar to take some pictures of the inside. Dammnn, you'll have to see this bar at night!

Click HERE to read more about the No.1 Ladies Detective Agency filming. Yes right here in Bots.
And click HERE for some more pictures.

I hope you guys had a great weekend. Mine was very gr8. I was also cracking my head to come up with a solution for the ''WAS IT A BAR OR A BAT I SAW'' on my last post. Oh my God! How could i have been so dumb? When you read the sentence going backwards- IT READS THE SAME!

Have a productive week! xx

For The Weekend...

When i come back on monday, i wanna find answers as to what you think about the sentence below:

WAS IT A BAR OR A BAT I SAW?

I was asked this question by my biology teacher at high school and he never got back to tell us the answer. So help!

Blessed weekend...

A Closed Mouth Gathers No Feet..

Case 1:




















Case 2:

A maid in a Sandton home wanted an increase.
The Madam was very upset about this and asked: "Now Princess, why do you want an increase?"
Princess: "Well Madam, there are three reasons why I want an increase, the first is that I iron better than you."
Madam: "Who said you iron better than me?"
Princess: "The master said so."
Madam: "oh."
Princess: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."
Madam: "nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?"
Princess: "the master did."
Madam: "oh."
Princess: "My third reason is that I am a better lover than you."
Madam (very upset now): "did the master say so as well?"
Princess: "no madam, the gardener did."

Whiling Away Time...

Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder...

A 10yr old boy was jealous of his new baby brother because his mother was not paying attention to him at all. Tired of this constant ignoring he decided to solve the problem once and for all. He decided to put poison on his mother's nipples while she was sleeping to kill the baby. The next morning....the gardener was found dead!

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!

Don't touch that which does not belong to you..

Have a very blessed laughing weekend.